Sometimes it seems like we’ve been here for a long time, and sometimes it seems like we haven’t. In fact, we’ve only been here for a couple of months so it really hasn’t been very long. And because it hasn’t been very long, I still find myself constantly comparing Texas to California. Of course there are advantages and disadvantages to both, but for now I will focus on the topic of vehicle registration.

Before I go any further, you must know that I do not like clutter. Clutter makes me crazy. I also do not like stickers of any kind on my car. I don’t have a problem with bumper stickers or other stickers on cars. In fact, some are quite amusing! I just don’t feel the need to advertise my political opinions, have stick figures of my family, blah, blah, blah. I like my car clean, uncluttered, and free of dog hair (sorry Lucy!).

Now, back to the registration…

It seemed simple enough. Move to Texas, get a Texas driver’s license, and register the cars. Easy, right? WRONG! First of all, vehicle registration is not managed by the Department of Motor Vehicles (like in California). It’s managed by the Department of Public Safety. Oh, I should probably also tell you that you can’t get a Texas driver’s license until you have registered your vehicle  And, for that, we must go to the Boerne Driver’s License Office, which is different than the place that does the vehicle registration. What? In California, we could just go in and spend the entire day at the DMV and take care of everything under one roof with one of those super friendly, DMV workers. Well Toto, we’re not in Kansas anymore!

Road Block! Although by law (Texas law, that is), our cars should have been registered within 30 days of our arrival, but we were waiting on the titles to both cars. After what seemed like an eternity, they both finally arrived. JD was elated! Now he can get his Texas driver’s license and get the cars registered! D’oh! I forgot to tell you about the part where you have to go get your vehicles inspected prior to getting them registered. It’s dumb. It’s completely lame. Take your car in, cough please. Okay you’re all set, here – put this sticker on your windshield. I was not home with this inspection took place. In fact, I was in California at the time. So when I came home, the first time I hopped in my car of course I noticed it right away.

Me: What is this? Why is there a sticker on my windshield? And why is there messy handwriting on it?

JD: It’s the inspection sticker

Me: I don’t do stickers. And I make a  frowny face.

Fast forward to today. JD has just returned from the magical place that manages vehicle registration and he has a temporary license plate to put on the back of my car. Here’s how this went:

JD: We’ll need to go to the dealer to get the frames for the front of our cars. Texas law says we need plates on the front too. Oh, here’s your temporary plate and here’s the sticker ( yes, another sticker!) that needs to go in your windshield.

Me: Oh so that goes on instead of the inspection sticker?

JD: No, it’s in addition to the inspection sticker.

Me: I’m not putting all those stickers on my windshield, put it in the glove compartment.

For those of you that do not know JD, you need to know that this man is as honest as the day is long. He is strictly a “by the book” kind of guy, and would NEVER, EVER entertain the idea of doing anything that was illegal or against the rules.

JD: But you have to, it’s the law.

Me: Well why do I need to leave the inspection sticker on if we have the actual registration which we couldn’t have gotten without the inspection?

JD: Well the law says you need both. Do you want me to put it on now?

Me: No, just leave it and I’ll do it.

JD: Okay, let’s go do it now (at this point I can tell he’s fearing my imminent arrest for not having the appropriate amount of stickers on my windshield)

Me: No, just put it in the glove compartment and if I get pulled over, I can show that I have it (yes, now I’m just being stubborn and seeing how far he’s going to let this go!)

Imagine this scenario: I’m driving along (with no front license plate, and no sticker on the windshield and I get pulled over. “What? I need a license plate on the front of my car? Sorry officer, but I just moved here from California and even though it’s required there too, Jerry Brown let’s us do whatever we want, otherwise it would be considered discrimination. And I do have the sticker, but I don’t like stickers on my car. Now I’m going to reach slowly into the glove compartment and get it out for you.

Or how about this scenario: I’m driving along minding the speed limit and I hit a parked car. State trooper rolls up and I tell him, “Officer I’m so sorry, but I didn’t even see that parked car because my vision was blocked by ALL OF THESE REQUIRED BY LAW STICKERS ON MY WINDHSHIELD!”

As it happens, JD just read tonight that effective in March of 2015, there will only be one sticker required (apparently I’m not the only one that doesn’t like stickers!). The question is, do I put the sticker on, or leave it in the glove compartment and fly under the radar for the next six months? Hmm…